Simon and I faking it in the Fashion World today.
“Darling, you look amazing!” my friend said, kissing me and plonking herself down in the bar next to me. I am not sure if there is any truth in this, if that is the compliment we girls tell each other without thought or consideration. I am prone to believing that its just “one of those things” and not based on real observations at all. But I am tired of batting away compliments when they come my way and so I said “Thank you…… ” then, just as quickly.. “Really?” “Yes, yes, hon.. you look AMAZING!” said my friend, grinning broadly at me as if mere words could not demonstrate her sincerity.
I don’t feel amazing. My incredibly bruised ego and dented pride has resulted in an affair with hair dye, as decreed in the girl code and so, after a massacre in the bathroom, I am a redhead.
But hair colour alone does not an amazing Mizzban make. I am confident that were my friend to see me some hours prior to our meeting, she would have expressed concern at my pale complexion, fuzzy hair and dark circles. Oh and the spots that have decided to visit me in my darkest hour. Makeup is my friend right now, my very best friend, forseaken only if a full face mask or paper bag were available to me. I feel as ugly as I have been made to feel which is pretty vile, let me tell you. Sometimes I want to punch someone, other days I don’t want to leave the house. Of course, these things are only temporary and nobody has to know about them. My red hair will blind people to my crumbling appearance until I really DO look amazing, amazing for the right reasons.
It is an interesting concept, that “Fake it til you make it”. Since my world imploded and my health let me down, I have been pretty subdued. The people I can stand to have around me right now I can count on one hand, the weird thing is they have all, without exception said something along these lines to me. The impression we portray to others can subconciously lift our mood when we don’t feel like that at all. Pretending we are living successfully can sometimes bring about this positive change. It is a tactic that is often applied to the business world and 1950’s America. Attainment is 80% belief in the outcome, portray the outcome you wish to see and the rest will follow.
Or so we hope.