Keep Your Mind Safe.

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Bit of a serious topic this, I try to balance this blog as much as I can, trying to get the right mix of writing/silly makeup posts and Photography/what is going on with Abi-type posts as possible, because I basically wanted this blog to be a space where I can elaborate on things I mention elsewhere on the web. I tweeted about my day yesterday and got a few DM’s from people who have been through a similar thing. I was in two minds if I should write about this at all but it affected me so deeply, I felt it was relevant.
Continue reading “Keep Your Mind Safe.”

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Keep Your Mind Safe.

Skin Deep

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Much as I like to use makeup, I also think there is nothing better than having good skin- after all, makeup only looks as good as the base it is applied on, right? I don’t wear makeup every day and certainly veer towards a lighter coverage base such as a bb cream or just a bit of concealer if needed. But everyone knows that dull, blemished skin cannot be improved by such a light coverage and that your skin needs to be pretty good without products, especially in the summer months. So how did I get my skin to the stage where I am happy to leave the house bare faced? Continue reading “Skin Deep”

Skin Deep

Shoot: Byron 2013

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I was talking to my friend Simon about Lord Byron and what he would be like if he were around in 2013. Would he still be as flamboyant or bored and dissatisfied with everything being so readily available? Would be be a Romantic hero? Or a Made in Chelsea brat?

I had the idea to shoot a portrait along the lines of a classical painting (top) but with the air of a sitter who has no patience, not even when it comes to his own vanity. We also shot some other fashion looks. Here is a brief preview of the day. The rest will probably be up at http://www.abibansal.com

Shoot: Byron 2013

Monthly Favourites (Sick Edit)

If you follow me on any type of social media, or if you caught my last post, you will know that I have been struck down with not one but two very nasty infections. Well today is the first day I have felt vaguely human so I thought I would do a little update on the products I have been loving this month.

Continue reading “Monthly Favourites (Sick Edit)”

Monthly Favourites (Sick Edit)

“Run Down” The Reality.

I am, and always will be the sort of girl who never knows when to stop. I have lost count of the amount of times I have finished food intended for a family of 4, dug away at a spot until it leaves a scar and picked at a boys faults until eventually, they grow tired of me and find somebody altogether less complicated.

 

The same, it would seem. Is true of my health. I have written openly here about my brush with depression, about how the knock on effect of not eating properly has affected my physical health and how a bout of innocent flu a few years ago, left my immune system ravaged and prone to pick up every little cold going.

Blame the fact that we have had an 11 month winter, that I get public transport everywhere and that since going freelance, I travel around 80% more than I used to for me getting ill so much. At first a couple of colds is a bit of an annoyance, then a persistent cough that just never seems to go away, then another cold whilst recovering meant that I seemed to be firefighting something-or-other for little over 6 months. I had become used to coughing until I was sick after climbing the stairs, used to sneezing multiple times in meetings and used to the cold sores that would make eating painful.

When I feel “Run down” as the popular term suggests, I tend not to want to eat, or only eat one thing. As a result my body has nothing in it to fight whatever it is that I need it to fight. I think it is a knee jerk reaction that when I get “sick”  I feel a bit depressed and punish myself even more by not eating. Vicious Cycle.

Also, we overlook the fact that a self employed person rarely listens when friends say “look after yourself”…. because there is nothing more annoying than a person with statutory sick pay telling you to rest up and take it easy when there is a high chance you might not make the rent that month. You just want to punch them. Rational.

So about a month after a horrible cough that somehow I never got around to getting seen to, I still feel a bit like it is lingering. I’m coughing in the mornings and being a bit sick when I go outside into the cold air but thats normal right?

Wrong.. it is so not normal. Feeling a bit tired I have an early night to wake up with raging shakes and shivers, followed by a week of persistent feverish episodes which cause me to think I am having an early Menopause. But I buy day nurse, take some Paracetamol. Feel okay.

Beause I have only ever felt “ok” I haven’t really been that well for months. Just getting by with symptoms which I have controlled with over the counter meds to allow me to do my next job, make my next appointment and get through my next visit to London.

It finally came to a head two days ago, where I actually fainted with a temperature of 40 degrees. I had been used to feeling sweaty for days by now, opening windows and drinking loads of water to help me function. I put it down to the final two wisdom teeth which were choosing their moment to make their unwelcome appearance.

It was with reluctance that I went to a walk in centre in the vague hope they would tell me that it was a bit of a cold and to go home and sleep. I didn’t bank on being told I had a Kidney and Lung infection that if left untreated could see me in hospital or develop into something sinister. I didn’t bank on being given antibiotics and ordered to take a week off with no work.

And here I am, in bed, still rattling with fever that makes me smell like a barbecue beef hula hoop and hoping the meds with start to kick in and clear up whatever I have done to myself this time. Another downside is that I am feeling quite depressed, something that I gather is linked to antibiotics and a bit emotional, which I put down to not having a stable body temperature. I am also pretty lonely, though I recognise the reason this is is partly my own doing. I am too snappy, pathetic and unloveable at the best of times so you can imagine what I am like when I am ill.

My hand has been forced not to work this week. I know I have to chill out and get well soon so that I can honour my commitments properly. I just wish I didn’t have boobs because sweaty underboob sure is uncomfortable.

I will be back here with a blog post about some recent work and shoots I have done soon.

 

 

“Run Down” The Reality.