I have sat down at my computer no less than 5 times to write this post. But I always stop, I am too busy, there are other things I could be doing! I’m a businesswoman Goddamnit! Client emails can’t wait! My best friend is getting married in a few weeks, I am up to my eyeballs in various projects and a large part of January was spent sorting my shit out. Not organizing for the sake of it, you understand.. actually attending to those piles of paperwork and setting those goals I promised myself I would. One of those goals was this blog, I started the year with the attitude that I would stop using the fact I was busy as an excuse for not putting more out there in this space. I realized that being busy wasn’t really an excuse, more that I should just be better organized. I am trying so hard to be that person.
Isn’t it amazing how in today’s culture there is a cult of “busy”? Everyone just loves to talk about how busy they are but you rarely hear of anyone cancelling their plans so they can sit at home binge watching Gossip Girl, if they are doing that (and trust me, I know people are doing that because the laws of the Universe dictate that it cannot be just me who is doing that) then they are dressing it up as being a secondary activity, alongside that tax return, client emails or planning blog posts. Nobody really ever comes out and admits to downtime, especially when they have their own thing going on. You always have to be seen to be doing, ideally for the betterment of your personal brand (ugh) it’s somehow not enough to be doing the thing that people pay you to do, you have to put in just as much effort being seen to be doing it. It’s not like “people” actually care how and when you complete these tasks, more the pressure we put on ourselves to be maintaining a punishing schedule at all times. Even our free time does not really seem admissible in the public arena, unless we are at a cool party or flying somewhere other than the place we spend the majority of our time.
I’m guilty of this. Somehow, somewhere something switched and I started to feel a sense of guilt if I wasn’t completely busy all of the time. I blame this on social media and the people who have made a living out of documenting their lives. Bloggers, vloggers and those who are Instagram famous are the original professionals at making you feel like a failure if you are not only using all your time but using it in a stylishly valid way. Put it this way, I very much doubt you will ever see me documenting anything on a Sunday except for my breakfast. This is because my breakfast is literally the most stylish thing about my Sunday. But don’t worry! I will still be sure to tell you how many emails I have to respond to, how many booking confirmations I need to send. Just incase you think I am slacking and therefore unsuccessful.
And I suppose that’s it. We all want to be seen as a success, nobody ever got on by doing nothing, right? The feeling of having to justify my time, my fee as a result of anything but output is actually completely mad. What does it matter so long as I meet deadlines, am available for a Skype call and turn up when I am supposed to? I’m resolving to worry less about being seen to be constantly doing something all the time and maybe I will actually be more productive in the long run.
Do you do this? I’m sure more of us do this than we would like to admit.
P.S. If you were to condense this blog for social media purposes, it would read; “Busy day! Emails followed by meetings! But first a blog post!” TTFN.